What's funny?

Anything with this zany music!!

-The Chaz

Happy Thanksgiving

Enjoy your turkey.

Stop.

Taiwan

Now that RSTMTBUSAINC is good and dead, the poor blogging skills of Zander have been replaced by the equally poor blogging skills of Taiwanese "Golden Dog." I highly recommend you check out the new blog at RST. Excellent engrish:

"Also, the Phil Sundbaum from USA who also used Space Jump fork during this contest got great 10th place."

http://www.rst.com.tw/news.asp

Although both are severely lacking in basic communication skills, Golden Dog updates more often, so the win goes to Taiwan in this round.

Windells/Black Market/keepin' it real

Thank you Cory Tepper for not cutting my head off. Ever.
And thank you for this fine research:

Ian Hylands: How do you feel about 24″ wheels and the growing prevalence of Sledgehammers in mtb?

Carter Holland: Personally I don’t think 24s are mountain bikes, I like John Cowan’s idea that a mtb has to have some combination of 26″ wheels, front brakes, gears and a shock. Besides looking goofy, it’s not a mountain bike. Guys are just riding 24s to make things easier”




Carter Holland riding
a Black Market
Bikes fully rigid,
rear brake only,
24" specific bike.
Soon to be in
production.
Real mountain bikes.

Pumptracks

TEAM_ROBOT stands by it's official stance of pumptrack stupidness. Going lots of directions, down a hill, and (especially) in the air is way cooler than going around in circles on flat ground. However, if you're going to fill your backyard with a pumptrack, it might as well be perfect.


SC pumptrack preview from jackson allen on Vimeo.

Arriba!

Team Robot/Human status report

Fuck yeah

Fuck yeah.

Yeah, so this is pretty cool. Thanks to Scott Hart to of people.





Also, in the previous post, I included this haiku:

I have just two moods:
Pissed and horny. I'm sorry.
You're not attractive.

This haiku was inspired by the true story of Patrick Funk. All credit goes to Patrick.

Real Mountain Bikes

Carter Holland riding a Black Market Bikes fully rigid, rear brake only, 24" specific bike. Soon to be in production. Real mountain bikes.

Food for Thought

On campus at PSU, we have a subterranean all vegan hipster cafe called "Food for Thought." Their mission is to "Serve food, art, and education. Aside from having a really steep, big wheelchair ramp leading to it's entrance that I've wanted to roll down in a swivel chair for a while, I payed this bastion of self-loathing and tight, uncomfortable mismatched "vintage" clothing no thought.

Until today. Today I had the joys of failing my first test, digging a gigantic berm, and plotting my death at the hands of vegetarians.

Food for Thought is holding open mic nights on Tuesdays, for music, art, commentary, or poetry. Being an aspiring poet myself, I leapt at the idea. I consider Haiku a pastime of mine.

I haven't selected the finalists for my performance, but these are some of my haikus:


Oh chicken, your pain.
So delicious is my gain;
With barbeque sauce.


They kill you, strip you.
Your life deemed worthless. But why?
You're yummy. That's why.


"The Hunter"
Stalked. Hunted. Killed. Destroyed.
The Hunter, he steals your life.
Who cares? You're a deer.


Kill them. Let them bleed.
Cut them apart. Burn the flesh.
Double Cheeseburger.


I voted for Bush,
I drive a big SUV.
McDonalds tastes good.


"Animal Rights"
So, Vegans are dumb.
Why don't you eat cheese products?
Go starve somewhere else.


"Vagina Monologue"
Vaginas are gross,
Don't tell me your monologues.
Keep it to yourself.


"Bicycle"
You ride a fixie?
That's cool, you're the first. P.S.
No one likes you. Die.


"Mechanized Slaughterhouses"
I like eating meat.
Mechanized Slaughterhouses?
Cheaper? Go for it.


I have just two moods:
Pissed and horny. I'm sorry.
You're not attractive.


I am white, straight, male,
Affluent, Republican.
Thus, I am Satan.



"The Pinnacle"
Die, die, die, die, die.
Die, die, die, die, die, die, die,
Die, die animals.

-Chaz

Rain

I saw the sun today.

-Chaz

Robot allies

The trails

Here's our super awesome floaty whipable hip as is:


















Which adaptation makes more sense?

































The choice is clear.


And just for reference, here's what it looked like during construction. It was a monster to build. The whole far side later collapsed after heavy rain, and had to be restacked. It was a monster job to build this monster landing:

Paying the bills here at TEAM_ROBOT

We at TEAM_ROBOT would like to announce an exciting new development. In the constant quest for sponsorship for racing, and as a result of our tremendous viewership, we have opened an ad space on our blog. Don't worry, this won't interfere with TEAM_ROBOT's goal of bringing you only the best and most useful bicycle related news. Thank you for your support.

Correction on 100th post

*TEAM_ROBOT WOULD LIKE TO APOLOGIZE FOR ANY MISCONSTRUED ATTEMPTS TO FAVOR HUMANS. PLEASE ALLOW ROBOTIC HUMAN KILLING TO RESUME.*

BACO!

Victorious bicycle stunt maneuvers. from Brett Rohlfing on Vimeo.

REDFANG!

one of TEAM-ROBOT's favorite bands ever.
portland based, they drink beer, they rock.
watch and learn
http://www.myspace.com/redfangpdx

Next President /100th Post

We at TEAM_ROBOT would like to celebrate our 100th post by congratulating the next president of the United States and the first African-American to become president, Barack Obama.




















Good luck Mr. Obama. America is rooting for you.

happy halloween